Deal breaker? Your significant others past.

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I was in the car this morning minding my own business, drinking my orange juice, and listening to my favorite morning show. On that show they always bring up the phrase “deal breaker” in regards to relationships. And as I drank my non-pulp orange juice I got to thinking (unusual isn’t it?) ‘What constitutes a deal breaker for different people?’. 

Now, I know this is an entirely open-ended question that could be answered thousands of different ways so spare me that much. As for me: I just started dating someone. Albeit its casual dating and nothing too too serious. The reason why I bring this up is because of her. Now, she is a wonderful person and if you had the opportunity to meet her I am sure you would be thrilled. The only thing is… she has a very colorful past in regards to men and her activities behind closed doors (or outside of closed doors). From what she tells me she is very experienced in the bedroom… I am a little old-fashioned in the sense I would like my woman to carry herself with dignity, class, and self-respect. No, I do not want a robot, and I’m not saying she doesn’t (well… I guess I am…). Among other things she is not very demure and a bit on the wild side. Again I am more conservative. But, let’s not stray from the topic at hand. She has a colorful wild past inside and out of the bedroom.

A friend put it to me this way: history shouldn’t matter, it’s the present that does. I have trouble ‘bedding’ that idea (pun intended). Why, because I believe our society still clings on to some traditions. At least I do. I want to be able to court a woman and be a gentlemen. I suppose our culture incensed our children with Disney movies about true love and blah blah blah. So we get the idea of true love in our heads and that love should be perfect. That’s not what my experience has taught me. It has taught me that real love is earned not to be just ‘fallen into’. We are all imperfect creatures. As such, can we be honest with ourselves and shed light on our espousal of these “Disney ideals”? We all want our perfect man or woman, but no matter what there is always dirt. The only question is if you can look past it.

I am having a hard time overlooking the past. I am of the mind that a persons past does not determine their future. BUT I also believe that looking at someones past might be a good indicator of actions they might make.

My question to you dear readers: what constitutes a deal breaker? What would make you call it off? Would the girls or guys sexual history make a difference to you???


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